(spoiler free)
Six films into their cinematic universe and Marvel delivered their first major movie milestone, ‘Avengers Assemble’. Whilst ‘The Curse of La Llorona’ certainly can’t be deemed an equivalent for the horror genre, it does serve as the sixth entry into the Conjuring Universe. Thanks to its impressive box office this cinematic universe is looking as healthy as ever even despite the lack of much critical acclaim for its spin off entries. So with that in mind would this new nightmare be able to bring back some credibility to the ever expanding horror franchise?
Unfortunately ‘The Curse of La Llorona’ may be the most unimaginative and by the numbers horror movie audiences will have seen for some time. There’s nothing here that viewers won’t have been exposed to before. The set up is fairly formulaic, an evil spirit, in this case La Llorona, is on the hunt for the children of an innocent suburban family. Even the family home that serves as the setting for much of this horror feels far too familiar, looking remarkably like others already witnessed in this universe and even more so when viewed across the genre as a whole. The story is as predictable as they come with nothing new or unique to offer audiences, failing to create anything memorable. At least the film gets through this narrative relatively quickly thanks to its short running time as if it had been any longer La Llorona would definitely have out stayed her welcome.
Despite this risk of her outstaying her welcome, La Llorona is actually revealed in all her glory far to early on. As a result the tension and suspense suffer greatly as the audience know what the threat is…an angry woman with a bit of runny mascara, a sight commonly seen on any UK night out, so what’s so scary about that? As you’ve probably come to expect with the mainstream examples in this genre ‘The Curse of La Llorona’ is heavily reliant on jump scares and admittedly they are effective in the moment. However, as quickly as the scares arise they fade once more. In addition to this some scenes would feel more at home in genre parodies such as the ‘Scary Movie’ series rather than in a serious horror film. As a result of all these issues this horror fails to register on the scare scale almost entirely.
All this is a shame as lead actress Linda Cardellini who plays Anna, the single mother of the children on La Llorona’s hit list is pretty good. Even without the rest of Mystery, Inc. it’s fun to see her in the horror genre again and she definitely makes the film more watchable. Her performance along with that of her on screen children make the family likeable and easy to root for but they don’t do enough to salvage the film from its painful unoriginality. Furthermore, in what feels like a last ditched attempt by the writers the final act sees the screenplay introduce some comedy, which had been almost entirely absent up until this point. These attempts to inject humour into what should have been the most tense section of the film are jarring and end up being funny for that reason only, instead of the actual comedy that they are trying to achieve.
So in what is arguably the weakest installment of the Conjuring Universe to date ‘The Curse of La Llorona’ may well encourage some cursing from audiences attempting to endure it for themselves. The solid main cast deserve better from their writers as the generic screenplay fails to inspire any actual scares or worthwhile family drama. Ultimately, its predictability across its narrative, horror and character actions make this feel like a tick box, cash grab production with not one “jinkies!” to be had!
Written by Hamish Calvert
Rating – 5/10
Question: What’s your favourite movie in the Conjuring cinematic universe?
(Leave your answers in the comments section below!)
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Thanks to Movie House Cinemas for screening access
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